Many of us walk through life thinking, “If only I had more money, all my problems would be solved.” But deep down, we know this isn’t the case. While money and power (status) can provide certain comforts, they aren’t the sole keys to happiness. What we really need is much more complex and fundamental - essential human needs must be met for us to thrive and live fulfilling lives.

Just like a plant needs soil, the nutrients in the soil, CO2, sunlight, and water to grow, we humans also require a balance of essential elements to thrive. A plant can have all the sunlight and CO2 in the world, but without water, it will wither and die. In the same way, we may have certain aspects of our lives in place - like a job or financial stability - but if other basic needs, like emotional support, community, or a sense of purpose, are missing, we too can begin to wither.

The Human Givens approach emphasizes that, beyond survival basics like food, water, and shelter, we all have deeper psychological and emotional needs that must be fulfilled. When these needs go unmet, we become vulnerable to mental health issues like stress, anxiety, depression, and addiction. Here are a few of the core basic human needs and why meeting them is essential to our wellbeing.

1. Security: The Foundation of Stability

Without security, it’s impossible to build a stable and fulfilling life. This need encompasses physical safety, but also emotional and psychological security. Whether it's financial stability or knowing that the people around us are dependable, security forms the bedrock of mental health.

Without a sense of security, we live in constant anxiety, and this stress can impact every other aspect of our wellbeing. Ensuring safety - emotionally and physically - is the first step toward stability.

2. Autonomy: Taking Back Control

In Martin Seligman's theory of learned helplessness, depression can arise when someone perceives themselves to have no control over their life circumstances. This feeling of helplessness creates a vicious cycle, where depression worsens the sense of powerlessness.

Autonomy - having control over our decisions and actions - is essential in breaking this cycle. When we take back control of our lives, we reduce feelings of helplessness, which in turn can relieve symptoms of depression. Autonomy allows us to create the life we desire, instead of merely reacting to circumstances.

3. Attention: The Hawthorne Effect

We all need attention - not just to receive it but also to give it. It’s normal to want recognition when we work hard or succeed at something. Children, in particular, thrive when praised for their efforts. This need for acknowledgment isn’t vanity—it’s a fundamental part of being human.

The Hawthorne Effect - derived from an experiment in the 1920s - shows that when people know they are being observed or acknowledged, their performance improves. This simple truth underlines the importance of attention in our lives: we need to be seen, heard, and appreciated.

4. Intimacy: Emotional Connection Heals

Intimacy is more than romantic love; it’s about having deep, meaningful connections with others. Studies (Seeman & Syme, 1987) show that lack of emotional support has a greater impact on heart disease outcomes than diet, exercise, or even family history. The feeling of being supported and loved is vital for physical and mental health.

It’s through looking into each other’s eyes and sharing our feelings that we learn to connect and trust, and this emotional bonding nurtures us at our core.

5. Community: Thriving Together

Humans are social creatures by nature, and community is essential to our wellbeing. We don’t thrive in isolation; in fact, loneliness is as harmful to our health as high blood pressure, obesity, and smoking. Studies (Cacioppo & Patrick, 2008) reveal that loneliness can even alter our DNA transcription, weakening our immune systems.

Belonging to a community - whether it’s family, friends, or a larger social group - gives us a sense of connection, purpose, and meaning. It’s a fundamental human need to feel part of something bigger than ourselves.

6. Status: It’s Not About Money

The Whitehall Study (Ferrie, 2004) found that those higher up in a social hierarchy tend to have better health outcomes, but not because of how much money they had. It was the dignity and respect they received that improved their wellbeing. Status isn’t just about money. In fact, research shows that poorer societies can often be happier than wealthier ones because their members don’t feel the stigma of being “less than.”

Real status comes from being valued for what you do or know. It’s the acknowledgment that you matter, and you are making a positive contribution.

7. Privacy: The Need for Personal Space

Studies show that people who share rooms in a household more frequently report higher levels of stress (Marsella, A. J., Escudero, M. et al. 1970). Overstimulation from constant social interactions can lead to distress, especially if we lack personal space.

Privacy allows us to recharge, reflect, and maintain emotional equilibrium. Everyone needs some time and space to themselves to process thoughts and feelings.

8. Competency: The Antidote to Low Self-Esteem

Achieving competence in at least one area of our lives is vital for maintaining mental health. Children, in particular, need to feel competent to develop a healthy sense of self-esteem. Learning and mastering skills - whether it’s in art, sports, or a profession - gives us a sense of accomplishment and confidence.

Small, achievable goals are the key to developing competence. Each success builds upon the last, increasing confidence and leading to more success, creating a positive feedback loop.

9. Meaning: The Search for Purpose

Human beings are meaning-seeking creatures. We want to know that our lives have a purpose beyond mere survival. Meaning amkes suffering tolerable. Viktor Frankl once said, "Suffering ceases to be suffering at the moment it finds meaning."

Meaning can be found in serving others, learning new skills, or connecting with larger philosophical, spiritual, or political ideas. It’s through stretching ourselves mentally, creatively, and physically that we discover our purpose and what makes life truly meaningful.

Conclusion: Meeting All Needs for Wellbeing

When people say, “If only I had more money, I’d be happy” or “when I find a partner, my life will be complete,” they’re missing the bigger picture. Yes, financial stability and intamcy are important, but they’re only one piece of the puzzle. To truly thrive, we must meet all our basic human needs - security, attention, intimacy, community, competence, and meaning.

If you find yourself struggling, whether it’s with stress, anxiety, or a sense of unfulfillment, reflect on these needs. Which ones are being met, and which ones could you focus on more? And remember, you’re not alone. Feel free to reach out if you need support in finding the balance that leads to a happier, healthier life.